THEFT!!!!!!!

I'm in the restroom this morning and I hear a gasp coming from the living room. Melissa was opening the curtains to the outdoor patio and noticed that her bike was missing. We were gone for most of the day yesterday and woke up kinda late today so it could have happened anytime. We have a feeling its one of the bastard kids in the neighborhood. Anywho, its gone. No more bike rides for the two of us any time soon. Which, sucks because it was one of the things we really liked about moving here. Unfortunatly, we don't have the cash right now to get a new one. So I hope whoever stole it gets a tree branch caught in the spokes and they land head first into a dumpster, the bastard. We contimplated putting a sign up where the bike was and write, "Nice work dip shit, now put it back". I decided not to in fear that it may compile the scumbag to do more. Where did the grill go? Wasn't there a garden gnome there? Urgh. What a suck! We ended up calling the police (Sorry Josh) to take down the info. Once the officer arrived I apologized profusly for tying him up with something so meaningless and domestic. He just chomped on his gum an asked his questions. Im a gambling man, so maybe there's a chance it will get found. If not, we may have to take it on ourselves to start an inverstigation. Just like Pee-Wee Herman. We'll get everyone! Our next door neighbor, "Perfect" Lisa from the office, Chuck, Dotty and Amazing Larry. Wish us luck!

In the meantime, we need 80 bucks for a new bike. Notice the telethon-like thermometer to the right. We will be tracking the donations that we recieve until we reach the goal. If you contribute, you will be sent an autographed photo of Melissa on her bike before it was stolen. Let's help this girl get on her wheels again people and donate. Just click on the donate button below the thermometer and you will be brought to PayPal. So what are you waiting for....Let's Just Do It!!!!!!!

4 comments:

Trav 9:03 PM  

DAMMIT!
That sucks!
I am really sorry to hear about that.
That Lisa looked a little suspicious to me...

Miss Maggotus 9:18 PM  

Melissa, I'm sorry! I definitely know what it's like to have something stolen, and it sucks major ass! I would like very much to contribute to your bike fund, but I've encountered a slight roadblock. I'm kind of low on American money, is Canadian okay?

Brian 12:33 AM  

Perfect! Canadian money works just fine. PayPal converts it to USD. :)

swirlogirl 11:46 AM  

that sucks royal terds! someone stole my shoes from outside my apartment in oshkosh. i've got a p.i. on the case and they will pay dearly! death is certainly an option!




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